Things I Would Do Differently
From before the time I got pregnant with our first child, I wanted desperately to be a godly mother who mothered well. Even though I wanted to be a mother very badly, I told God that I only wanted to be a mother if I could be a Christian mother. I was thrilled when He gave us children.
I tried very hard and made decisions with purpose. My children are godly and they love God so much. For that I am grateful. However, I still look back and think of things I would do differently if I could mother my little children again. I try (gently) to share these things with my children and to support them when they make better decisions than I did.
Here are some of the things I would change:
Screen Time
I let my children sit in front of screens much more than I would now. I was super careful about what was on my children’s screens, but they sat there more than they would if I were rearing them again. Granted, they didn’t have as many screens available as folks do now. At first our only screen was the television–much tamer than TV is now, but certainly not godly and still a waster of precious time.
Of course, my grandchildren have been born into a world with many kinds of electronic devices. This worries me a great deal, not only for my own grandchildren, but for other people’s children and grandchildren, too. I fear that children will be hurt because their parents are distracted by a device when a child is in the bathtub or on the edge of a street. I worry that children are missing valuable sensory experiences because they are staring at a screen. I have much more to say about this. Stay tuned for a later blog.
Babysitters
Ray and I tried to be careful about the people our children were with. Still, we had close calls with a couple of babysitters we used. I had felt okay about them because I met them at church. I found out that just because I met someone at church didn’t mean they were capable of being responsible for my children. I would be much more careful about this if I were rearing my children today.
Time with Extended Family
Since we moved to the rural community where we live now, I have met many people who are very close to their extended families. I wish we had done a better job with this as our children were growing up. I would handle this very differently if I could do it all over again. I remember a family we knew in Illinois who returned home to Texas for a visit about once a month. At the time, I thought they were really strange. Now, I think they were wise to keep those family connections strong.
None of us are going to make good decisions every time. If we did, Jesus would not have needed to die. I am thankful that God has given my family grace and that He keeps teaching us.
A poor yet wise lad
is better than an old and foolish king
who no longer knows how to receive instruction.
Ecclesiastes 4:13, NASB