A Higher Goal than Good Grades in English
Homeschooling became a joy for us when I learned to focus on the life outcomes I wanted for our children instead of expected education requirements. The list of objectives Ray and I adopted in 1994 included:
Learn to communicate.
Listening, speaking, telling the truth, kind and engaged body and facial language, writing clearly, understanding what we read, and other communication skills are basic to worship, work, marriage, parenting, friendship—in other words, life. Therefore, communicating well is a higher goal than making good grades in English.
A class in freshman English at Iowa State College,
photo by Jack Delano, May 1942,
courtesy of the Library of Congress
God has given Ray and me many blessings related to our visit to Mayo Clinic. First, Ray actually got appointments. We didn’t have to wait very long. Our son, John, was willing and able to go with us. We learned that the visits were covered by insurance. Our grandson wanted to come along to spend time with us. We arrived safely.
We began our first day with an hour and a half appointment with a doctor who listened to Ray’s complete medical history from the last three and a half years. As I described the doctor in a text to a friend: “This first doctor is amazing!! I don’t know how he could be better.” Ray described him like this: “He knew what questions to ask. He focused on the issues. He listened well. He demonstrated concern. He put the various issues together well. His face was expressive. When he heard something sad, he showed it. When he heard something concerning, he showed it.”
In other words, this doctor had learned to communicate. The way he communicated would be a great way for husbands and wives to communicate, for parents to communicate with their children and vice versa, and for a lawyer or plumber or mechanic or exterminator or store clerk to communicate with a customer or client. The list could go on and on.
By contrast, imagine if the doctor had asked no questions, seemed preoccupied, listened with preconceived notions, appeared not to care, and sat in front of Ray stone faced or bored. Likely each of you has encountered a doctor, lawyer, plumber, mechanic, exterminator, or store clerk who behaved more like that than like the kind doctor we met on Thursday.
God’s Word teaches us how to communicate well with our words.
There is one who speaks rashly
like the thrusts of a sword,
But the tongue of the wise brings healing.
Proverbs 12:18
His Word also teaches us how to listen well.
He who gives an answer before he hears,
It is folly and shame to him.
Proverbs 18:13
A plan in the heart of a man is like deep water,
But a man of understanding draws it out.
Proverbs 20:5
While it is easy to get bogged down in the mechanics of teaching language arts and English, it is crucial to remember that our goals for our children go far beyond what they need in this life.
If we have hoped in Christ in this life only,
we are of all men most to be pitied.
1 Corinthians 15:19
I’m so glad that Ray had a good experience at the Mayo Clinic. Praying that this leads to effective treatment. And you’re so right about the importance of shifting the focus in homeschooling to desired outcomes.