It’s okay to need help!

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One of my weaknesses is assigning tasks to other people. I am really lousy at it. Years ago when we worked with churches with several Sunday School classes, I was often involved in organizing Sunday School materials. Sometimes we had work days when volunteers came to help with various tasks. I dreaded the responsibility of handing out assignments. I wanted everyone to feel useful and to feel that they were contributing, but I wasn’t good at organizing jobs for everyone. I felt the pressure to make sure no one was standing around wondering what to do. I was much more comfortable doing things myself — even though there was more to do than I could do.

My sweet husband is so helpful. One of the many things he has taken on is buying our paper stuff — paper towels, paper napkins, toilet paper, tissues, and such. I appreciate it so much, but I have to confess that I feel guilty. I feel as though I ought to be able to keep up with that and every other detail of our packed lives. He assures me that he is glad to do it, but a little voice in my head says that I should be doing that myself.

Little Gladys Crimer dries her hands on a paper towel while Bernice Mathis and Edna Law wash their hands in the clean-up corner of the second and third grade school room at Flint River Farms, Georgia, eighty years ago in May 1939. Courtesy Library of Congress.

Many years ago a friend told me sheepishly that she had hired someone to clean her house. She was embarrassed about it. At the time, I wondered why in the world she would be embarrassed. My thoughts were something like, “Cool! Way to go! Enjoy it! That would be wonderful!” But, then, I understand her embarrassment, too.

So, what about it, mamas? Do we have to be the Lone Ranger while we are trying to be Susie Homemaker,  Betty Crocker™, Teacher of the Year, Entrepreneur of the Year, Mother of the Year, and the Most Wonderful Wife in the Whole Wide World? Do we have to do “it all”? Can we give ourselves permission to get some help?

God’s Word says that it is okay.

One time Moses was supposed to hold his hands up while God gave the Israelites victory in a battle, but Moses couldn’t do it.

But Moses’ hands were heavy.
Then they took a stone and put it under him,
and he sat on it;
and Aaron and Hur supported his hands,
one on one side and one on the other.
Thus his hands were steady until the sun set.
Exodus 17:12

Thank you, Aaron and Hur.

In Acts 6, the twelve apostles had a problem they had to deal with. Hellenistic Jews who had become Christians were complaining because the Christians were not taking care of their widows as well as they were taking care of the Christian widows who were born Hebrews.

So the twelve summoned the congregation of the disciples
and said, “It is not desirable for us
to neglect the word of God in order to serve tables.
Therefore, brethren, select from among you
seven men of good reputation,
full of the Spirit and of wisdom,
whom we may put in charge of this task.
But we will devote ourselves
to prayer and to the ministry of the word.”
Acts 6:2-3

Thank you, Stephen, Philip, Prochorus, Nicanor, Timon, Parmenas, and Nicolas.

Even the amazing woman in Proverbs 31 had maidens.

An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain . . . .
She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.
Proverbs 31:10-11, 15

So . . . I think it’s okay for Ray to go to the store for napkins and I think it’s time for you and me to give ourselves a break and ask for help when we need it. Otherwise how are other people going to fulfill this command?

For you were called to freedom, brethren;
only do not turn your freedom
into an opportunity for the flesh,
but through love serve one another.
Galatians 5:13



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One comment

  1. “He assures me that he is glad to do it, but a little voice in my head says that I should be doing that myself.”
    This has often caused issues at our house because I feel ‘I’ should be doing a certain task that my husband pitches in to do…. and so willingly.
    How I need to be thankful and NOT pridefully feel inadequate when I receive help.
    THANK YOU… again! 🙂

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