Granddaddy Wes II
Ray and I were discussing our plans for the fall the other day. One thing he would like to do is to visit his hometown. Ray’s daddy was an only child and Ray’s only brother has also moved away. The closest thing to a relative we have in Columbia, Tennessee, is Wes’ first cousin’s husband, but we can share Ray’s childhood memories and honor and remember his parents. We also plan to visit a teacher who made a great impact in Ray’s life. Through Ray’s writing, this history teacher actually has an impact on homeschooling families all over the country. Aren’t God’s ways amazing?
There was a time when Notgrass was a well-known name in Columbia. Ray’s grandfather was a buyer for a downtown department store and he was known around town as Notty. While Granddaddy Wes lived with us for the better part of eight years, we helped him stay connected with those who loved him back home. During the winter before he died in the spring, we took him on one last pilgrimage to his hometown.
We visited people and places that were important in his life, and I took photos. We stopped to see the house where Ray’s family lived until he was four years old. His dad built the garage in the background on the left.
We stopped to see the home in the subdivision where Wes moved his family when Ray was four. He and his dad took long walks through the fields behind the house.
Wes worked for The Daily Herald newspaper for more than fifty years. He began carrying papers when he was a boy. After high school, he became circulation manager and continued at the paper until he left to serve in the military during World War II. After the war, he went back to work at the newspaper. One day the boss called Wes in and said, “We haven’t talked about salary.” Wes replied, “No, sir, we haven’t.” His boss wrote a great offer on a slip of paper. handed it to Wes, and asked if that would be okay. Wes responded, “Yes, sir!”
After Wes retired, his former co-workers were always thrilled to see him when he came back to visit. The same was true on that winter day. Ray always enjoyed visiting the Herald with his dad. He also worked for them as a newspaper carrier as a boy. He later worked as a proofreader. Printer’s ink ran in Wes’ veins and still runs in Ray’s.
Wes’ first cousin’s husband (who remarried after Wes’ cousin died) was happy to see us.
We visited the graves of Wes’ parents.
Wes had a special bond with his minister in Columbia. They had a deep personal respect for one another.
We stopped to see the home Wes shared with his second wife for twenty years . . .
. . . and enjoyed a quick visit with their next door neighbor.
The work involved in taking care of Granddaddy Wes increased over time. As everyone who has cared for a person who is declining with age can tell you, he had good days and bad days. We did, too. Except for a few nights in hospitals, we were able to keep him at home with us until he died. We could not have done it without the help of John, Bethany, and Mary Evelyn. The girls cooked and helped with the mountains of laundry that pile up when caring for an elderly person. All three of the children gave us times away. When we celebrated our thirtieth anniversary less than two years before Wes died, they took care of him while we took a much-needed vacation to British Columbia.
Several months before Wes died, Ray came to the point that he just couldn’t go on with the night and day personal care that his dad needed–things that a guy or a nurse needed to do. We talked with the children about moving Granddaddy Wes to a nursing home. I will always appreciate what the children did then.  Bethany and Mary Evelyn continued their sacrificial cooking and laundry care and gave us times away. John volunteered to take a daily shift to perform Granddaddy Wes’ personal care. The bond of grandfather and grandson grew even stronger.
I had a close personal relationship with my father-in-law long before he moved in with us. He always wanted me to call him just Wes. I felt sheepish about calling this dignified, honorable, aged man by his first name, but knew that the best way to honor him was to do just want he wanted me to do. I loved him from the time Ray first took me to Columbia. I have many special memories, but a favorite one was a time when he was with me while I was dropping Ray off at work. I said to Ray, “I love you.” Wes said to me: “Keep loving him.” I have and I will.
You shall rise up before the grayheaded
and honor the aged,
and you shall revere your God;
I am the Lord.
Leviticus 19:32
Your story reminds me of the “heritage tour” that my mother, my daughters and I took to Tarpon Springs, Florida, in March of this year. My mother spent two days driving us around to all the locations that were important in her heritage, from the house where the family lived when she was born, to the elementary and high schools she attended, to the sponge docks where my Granddaddy was a diver during the war, to the church where my parents were married, etc. The whole time we were driving around, she narrated the sight-seeing on a little tape recorder, explaining what we were looking at and sharing family stories and funny anecdotes. We made memories that weekend that will last a lifetime. I’m so thankful for a rich family legacy of love, faith, and fidelity.
I’ve found these past two entries particularly touching. Granddaddy Wes was blessed to have you, and this is a touching tribute to him and his legacy. Thanks for sharing; your daily encouragement is just that!