His Helper
Two of my favorite Little Golden Books are We Help Daddy by Mini Stein and We Help Mommy by Jean Cushman. Both were illustrated by my favorite Little Golden Book illustrator, Eloise Wilkins.
In these books, very young children help Mommy sweep and wash dishes and make the bed and cook and shop for groceries. They hand Daddy a hammer and pull weeds in the garden and wash the dog and hang a picture and gather clippings while Daddy trims the hedge.
Wise mamas and daddies train their children to be Mommy’s little helper and Daddy’s little helper. However, God gave someone else the role of Daddy’s helper, too.
God created each of our husbands to be unique individuals. Think about your husband. What are his specific needs and desires? How can he use your help? Think about how you can be his unique and suitable helper.
A farmer and his wife examine a phonograph
at an auction near Tenstrike, Minnesota,
September 1939. Photo by John Vachon.
Courtesy of Library of Congress.
I have seen a great deal of emphasis in homeschooling circles about the leadership roles of husbands. Of course, that is a good thing because it is biblical. God does call men to be leaders in their families.
However, I have also seen the concept taken too far. Yes, men have a great deal of responsibility, but it is God Who said that men need a helper. It is God who provided wives for that purpose. I have witnessed men with very bright, talented, and loving wives make decisions that would have been better decisions if they had taken advantage of the wisdom and knowledge of their very bright, talented, and loving wives.
I encourage you to be respectful while also being the helper your husband needs. Yes, he has a leadership role, but the wise leader listens to good counsel. The wise husband listens to the helper God gave him. The wise wife speaks up with respect to be the helper he needs.
Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” . . . So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. The man said,
“This is now bone of my bones,
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.”
For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.
Genesis 2:18, 21-24